Surgery

Ok, so I have a somewhat embarrassing confession to make, don’t judge me either! Lol I’m sure someone can relate..

I have a passion for people (which is crazy to even say now, because I was super antisocial & awkward growing up. I honestly didn’t care to even be around people) but anyway, I have this passion that sometimes leads to me going places in my head, like I’ll imagine myself speaking to a crowd of people, encouraging them, praying for them, just being God’s vessel. I’ll even preach to myself sometimes, chile. 😂 so earlier, while I was praying & talking to God, it turned into one of my “sermons” & I asked the “congregation” 😂😂 “y’all ready for the Lord to CUT some things out of your life? Y’all ain’t ready to have surgery!” 🤦🏽‍♀️😭

But then I stopped because I’m like oh wow Lord that’s a word right there!! (At this point I’m hype 😂 I had to hurry up & get out the shower, so I could start writing)

Immediately God said to me, “Going through with surgery is a commitment. Once I do it, it can’t be undone. That thing you want me to fix can only be fixed with your consent. (You got to sign on the dotted line!) performing surgery will SURELY bring about a change that will alter you entire life, but you don’t want that! You wanna keep trying to fix it on your own. You wanna try to manipulate it as much as you can & then come to me like here God, I made it a little better. Put your magic touch on it, so I can keep it in my life! I won’t do it as much, I promise. I know how to turn it on & off now, so it won’t control my life. I fixed it now, so you don’t have to take it completely away!” 😩

(we’re always trying to bargain with God smh)

We say we want change, but our problem is, we want it to be suitable for us.. convenience.. that’s temporary! Which is why we do good for a while, then fall right back.. God wants to do surgery. It’s permanent. Once He cuts that thing up & out, it’s gone forever. God wants to do miraculous works IN & THROUGH us, but there are things we have to allow HIM to change. We can’t change them in our own strength & for some of us, it’s getting to the point where it won’t be changed at our “own leisure” of “choosing” to “let go & let God” it will be snatched from our grip because it’s slowly killing us & those connected to us…..

The thought of surgery is scary, but it’s just that deep, because we’ve been living with these flaws for so long… it’s gonna take more than praying & going to church to fix it. It’s time for GOD to lay HIS hands on us! You ready?!

Ezekiel 36:26-27 (NLT) 🦋

From The Heart

I was sleeping good, but I woke up with a headache & as I was laying here trying to go back, I got frustrated, because two hours later, after meditation with my abide app, listening to a sermon, reading some scriptures on my bible app, I still couldn’t fall asleep. All of a sudden my frustration led to tears & feelings of loneliness, which led me to this prayer. I went straight to my notes in my phone & got to typing. Just thought I’d share for anyone else who has these type of nights.. you may even be up right now, feeling the same exact way..

Lord, fill the voids in my life. Fill every empty part of me that makes me long after anything that is not of you. Heal my brokenness. Put an end to my lustful desires. Everything that I’ve sought after in my life, as a replacement of you, remove it! Hear my prayer, Oh God & renew & restore me. All I need is you. Lord I am begging you to heal me emotionally. I don’t wanna live in bondage anymore. I don’t wanna be a slave to my strongholds anymore. I don’t wanna feel like I need a “physical” thing more than I need you. Your spirit. Your love. Your kindness. I am hurting God. Heal me. Make me whole again. Hear my heart Lord. Hear my cry Lord. I long for you. I search for love & I can’t find it. I search for peace & I can’t obtain it. I search for joy & run with whatever feels good in the moment. I don’t wanna keep doing that. I don’t wanna keep selling myself short for temporary satisfaction. It never lasts, outside of you. It’s never complete outside of you. It’s never whole outside of you. Fill me up God. Less of me & more of you. Take my weaknesses & give me strength. Endurance. Obedience. I believe that nobody else can do it like you can. Lord, my hope & trust is in you. Amen.

How to REALLY ‘Cast your cares’, ‘Give it to God’, or ‘Let Go and Let God’…

BE BLESSTIFIED!

If you’ve been a Christian or been in church any amount of time you’ve heard it or read it…

1 Peter 5:7 (NKJV)

⁷ casting all your care upon Him, for He cares for you.

But, many times when we’re honest with ourselves it’s not always that simple.

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Some of our benefits of being in relationship with God can become churchy clichés and sometimes lose their power due to our OVERUSE and UNDER APPLICATION.

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Why?

Because we don’t know how! How do you really “Give it to God”? How do you really “Let go and let God”? Have you ever tried to do that and it was still there? How do you do that? Have you ever asked yourself, “Is there something wrong with my faith?” “What am I doing wrong?”

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After 48 years on this earth and 21 years as an ordained minister, I’m FINALLY learning how to ‘Cast…

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When Sex Doesn’t Heal Your Brokenness

For anyone else who may need this just as much as I did! 💛

Over and over again I contemplated writing this. Would it be too personal? Would it make people uncomfortable? Is it really necessary to share some of the most personal, intimate, details of my life? These were the three questions that ran through my mind over and over again before I finally opened my computer to write. I began to think to myself how sometimes we as Christians without even knowing it underestimate the power of God’s grace by choosing to hide the not so perfect parts of our lives. When we choose to hide the not so perfect moments of our lives we unconsciously deny the power of what Jesus did on the cross. We unconsciously allow ourselves to become victims of shame and guilt. We unconsciously, without even saying a word communicate to others that what Jesus did on the cross wasn’t powerful enough to deliver and rescue them…

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More Life 💙

Have you ever said to God if you just give me a whole new heart I won’t hate this person or I won’t be naive for him/her anymore. I won’t resent this person, or be bitter because of this situation. I won’t act this way, etc? IF SO, I’m gonna need you to focus less on your heart & more on your head!

Your heart remembers how it felt, but your head stores what was said & how it all went down.

Some ppl say “Yeah, I forgive but I’ll never forget.” You CAN forget! & you can do so by choosing NOT to allow those tormenting thoughts to take residence in your mind! It’s bad enough that your heart is broken, but you wanna hold on to the memories too?! 🤦🏽‍♀️ that’s our problem. We want to reminisce so much on “history” that we have with someone, but what is that doing for our health?! What is that adding to the present?! No need for me to go into detail. Let’s get down to these TIPS. ✍🏽

You have to first GET RID of the source that’s causing you pain. It doesn’t matter if it’s drama with family, an ex, THEIR family, a current relationship, a job, a teddy bear, prom pictures, love letters, text messages, certain social gatherings, social media, whatever! How do you expect to get rid of the pain if you’re still holding onto/entertaining it? You may not look at it this way, but one day, while you’re minding your own business, you’re gonna entertain the smallest thing, one thought is gonna lead to another & next thing you know, you done relapsed & overdosed on memories that amount to absolutely NOTHING, TODAY. Now you depressed! (Sounds a bit dramatic, but that’s how it is lol) seriously, let that hurt go!

Moving right along to the second tip, after you’ve gotten rid of it, you have to now, OCCUPY that space with something positive, because everyone knows that an idle mind is the devil’s playground. Don’t just throw it out & mope over it, celebrate! Treat yourself with a new book, some daily inspirational quotes, make yourself a vision board, stick some encouraging scriptures on the wall. Most importantly, AVOID all people/places/things that will cause you to revisit that place of hurt!

Lastly, now that it’s out with the old & IN with the new ✨💁🏽‍♀️ DO WHAT MAKES YOU HAPPY! & I don’t mean try & make it look like you’re happy, but be happy forreal! Whatever brings you joy, it doesn’t matter how big or small. LOVE ON YOU! Take care of yourself & your mental health. DEMAND peace in your life & do whatever it takes to protect it. Explain yourself to no one. Do you boo boo. 😘 (ALL in the name of love & respect though. Let’s not get too carried away. Don’t need anybody out here looking crazy 😂) anyway, I hope this helped someone! I’m gonna leave you with this scripture:

“I pray that God, the SOURCE of hope, will fill you completely with joy and peace, because you trust in Him. Then you will overflow with confident hope through the POWER of The Holy Spirit.”

Romans 15:13 🦋

Appreciation post 💖

First of all, let me just say THANK YOU for all of your support!!! I never would’ve imagined in a million years, that I’d receive so much feedback from all over the world! 😱 I thank God for placing so many beautiful people in my path to be apart of this journey with me. I honestly thought no one would tune in, but God is continuously connecting the dots. 😍

Six months ago, I was a mess. I was super insecure about even starting my blog, but God wouldn’t allow me to talk myself out of this one. Rarely do I get personal on here, because my blog isn’t about me, or what I like to do in my free time, it’s about what God places on my heart to help heal & encourage others. Everything God leads me to share, I’ve either experienced in the past, or He is simply giving me revelation on something I’m going through at that time, because someone needs it!

I am beyond grateful, because I am nowhere near the same person I was when I started! I’ve leveled up, mentally, spiritually, & especially emotionally (THANK GOD) I don’t care what my life LOOKS like to anyone else, because I KNOW how FAR God’s brought me! Last year, I couldn’t even place my mind on being where I am today. I was so broken & out of order last year, y’all, I couldn’t even imagine being as accomplished as I am right now. 💛

Accomplished because God spoke & I obeyed.

Accomplished because I stepped out of my comfort zone.

Accomplished because I started something & didn’t stop.

I’m setting goals & meeting them!!! Wow! Who ever would’ve thought! I’m the type to give up, so just the fact that I’m committed & haven’t left my goals idle, is MAJOR for me! You can do it, too! No matter, how small, if it means something to you, it means something to God, & that’s what counts!!

Overall, I just want to encourage you to do what’s been placed on your heart. It may seem unrealistic, uncomfortable, impossible, or even insignificant, but GOD will make it happen for you. All you have to do is start! Don’t keep putting it off & don’t give up on it! If you have a bad day, or make some not so good choices, don’t dwell on it! If you don’t feel driven, push PASS your feelings! The call on your life is greater than just you. There are people who NEED what you have to offer. Yes, YOU. 😊

Once again, thank you for your time & all of your positive feedback! Every like, share, comment, message, & email means the world to me! More than anything, I wish you God’s PEACE & EVERLASTING love!

Philippians 1:6 🦋

What are you fighting for?

There’s some things you want from God, spiritually, but you’re gonna have to fight for it, just like you do for those things in the natural. Just because God knows the desires of your heart doesn’t mean He’s gonna do all the work for you. You don’t have to know how to right all your wrongs, just give God a willing heart to work with! You’ve gotta make the conscious effort to find out what it is that’s keeping you bound & WHY you’re bound to it! Most times we just wanna know what, but it’s the WHY that keeps us going back! It’s the WHY that teaches us. The WHY is the root! Figuring THAT out will stop it from growing, because we will no longer FEED into what we KNOW is slowing us down! Pluck that thing up & CURSE it in the name of Jesus! Once you know better, do better, because GOD holds you accountable. Confess the hell you’ve caused in your own life & fight to heal it!

Ok, now that we’ve gotten that out of the way, let’s get into the bulk of this message.

About a week ago, God really began to deal with me on a certain matter, but yesterday He clearly said to me, “What are you fighting for? You seem to have forgotten.” God asked me this, because I’d lost my stamina. How quickly did I forget what He brought me out of & how hard I fought to get here!

Last year was the second most trying year of my life. I battled with many things, mentally & spiritually. Things that could have taken me out, if I hadn’t made the decision to FIGHT! I was weighed down with shame, guilt, & depression. My rebellious ways ultimately led me deeper & deeper into sin. Overwhelmed with anxiety, I still was too prideful to go to God for help, so I tried to figure things out on my own. (SMH) I had the tools to fight, but couldn’t even suit up, because I was too consumed with the ways of this world.

Finally, I knew something had to give.

If you’re anything like the (old) me, then you probably deny the (lies) you tell yourself & avoid the truth as long as no one is calling you out on it! It’s funny how we let our own mess pile up, then get mad when someone smells it! But thank God for those who love us enough to tell us about ourselves, right? You may not wanna hear it, but it helps, so take heed!

Anyway, that’s when the fight started. It took a bit of correction & tough love for me to get in alignment. No longer did I neglect what I knew; I applied it! (Put what you know to use!) I went straight to (The Source) for direction. I didn’t go seeking for attention or a pity party. I knew I was wrong! I had to put on my big girl panties, look my flaws directly in the face, & surrender my mess to God!

I had to confess some things to God, that I never planned on saying out of my mouth, because I was so ashamed.

I got in position & prepared to fight. In order to get my peace back, I had to fight. I had to fight for a renewed mind & spirit. I had to fight to restore my relationship with God. I had to fight that thing I knew made me weak. If I wanted deliverance, I had to fight for a breakthrough & fight to stay free!

Even though, I knew it was sincere, I dug deeper. I knew it was gonna take more than one prayer, one confession, one breakthrough, one revelation… I had to get desperate & keep going to God until the battle was won. & even then, I still went back & prayed over those same places to be sure there was no residue!

I promise, it’s not as scary or as hard as you think. The sooner you get started, the sooner your life will be better. APPLY what you KNOW to any area of your life that has become stagnant. When you ACT on it, things HAVE to change. They just have to! 🤷🏽‍♀️

Peace, love, & prosperity, my friends! 🦋 I pray that this blog brought you inspiration, determination, & the WILL POWER to get up & fight back! Have a blessed week! 💛